townie TV is so depressing

With daytime temperatures hovering around 13ºC and the wind howling down from the mountain tops reducing them even further, no way was I venturing outdoors. Below freezing at night, it was worse. So what to do?
Issue date : 01 August 2008

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With daytime temperatures hovering around 13ºC and the wind howling down from the mountain tops reducing them even further, no way was I venturing outdoors. Below freezing at night, it was worse. So what to do? Switch on the TV and become a couch potato. With neighbour Jan and the Jack Russells for company, all huddled around the fire with mugs of coffee liberally laced with Klippies, we tuned in to watch the Bokke play the All Blacks.

Watching them lose did nothing to improve our mood. Jan’s heated commentary about the ref’s poor decisions and our team’s handling errors also did nothing to warm the atmosphere. Then came the women’s final at Wimbledon. Our wives joined us to watch. In deference to the ladies present, Jan’s commentary was more restrained and confined to “Amazons more at home in a Roman gladiator tournament!” To which Wifey Dear replied, “With no blood around, unlike in your rugby match.”

For light relief we watched Larry King on CNN interview a panel of so-called experts on UFO sightings and try to uncover whether they were real or not. If real, why the official cover-up? Is the world too terrified to discover that little one-eyed green ET creatures from outer space are intent on invading our planet? Sure, it would change our beliefs in pre-recorded history and religion and give credence to the Big Bang theorists on how it all began. Perhaps Islam and Christianity would then find some accord while they waited for the extraterrestrial invasion. “Until I find crop circles in my mielie lands, I’ll stick to what I believe in!” said Jan. Switching to the news, it was all about Mugabe’s intransigence and the African Union’s lame attempts at making him realise his number’s up.

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Then there was news about our economy. In a mess. Diesel at over R11/â„“. Interest rates spiralling. Will we be able to afford to plough this spring? And the price of food? I’d rather not go there! townie TV is so depressing Bring on the little green men from outer space, wearing T-shirts saying “Been there, done that.” Perhaps they mean no harm and will show us a better way to live. Or bring on the warm weather of spring so we can mothball our TV sets, get outside in the sun and stop being exposed to things mere mortals have no control over. ET for president, I say! – Derek Christopher